Submission is not for me....or so you think!

In an age of feminism, empowerment for women, and equal rights we have lost God's plan. It is the classic scenario of women trying to get for themselves by their own means what they deam the things they deserve and their "rightful place" in the world. They want to be their husband's equal in the home, the boss in the workplace, et cetera. They set up their marriages in this vain, sacrifice their homes and their families to be seen anad treated how they view as equal and when they reach they stop to look around they see children who have been lost to drugs, alcohol, or a variety of sinful things; a marriage that has either fallen by the wayside or is only a shadow of what it was intended to be; and themselves are tired, unfulfilled, and dissatisfied.

I have seen it time and time again. Women fight Godly submission like it was a thief trying to invade their home and steal their most valuable possessions. They say things like - "Submitting makes me a slave," "He has no right to tell me how I should do things! I'm his wife not his child." "I can do it better than he can so why should I listen to his way?" "I'm his equal. We should decide things together. He shouldn't hand out orders that the rest of us have to follow." Any of those statements or feelings sound familiar?

God never intended for us as women to be slaves to our husbands. However, he never intended us to be their equals either. Now, before I lose most of you please just bear with me. Any woman who strives to be her husband's equal will fail as will her marriage. I have never met a woman yet who tried to be her husband's equal who was successful and had a happy, healthy marriage. It doesn't work. Why? Because it's not how God set marriage up to work. Men and women were not created equal in the context of marriage. Women were created to be the man's "help meet". (Check out Genesis for the whole story!)

Men were created to need women and women were created to fill that need. And in truth, that's how any relationship works. There is always a dominant party. Even with children. If you see two children playing one will always submit to the other or else their play won't last very long before an argument breaks out. Marriage is no different. One party must submit to the other or else all you have is two people constantly rallying for the role of authority.

What God intended from the first marriage consecrated in the Garden of Eden was that the husband would be the authority and the wife would submit to his authority. Notice I did not say submit to him. That was never God's intention. Men are sinful. Sometimes they are even unsaved. That does not release the woman from her duty of submission. Because God's commandment to women was to submit to their husband's authority. Meaning you submit to your husband because of his role. You don't submit because he is the most Christian man you know, because he is a good father, because he is a good provider, even tempered, etc. You aren't let out of your duty to submit because he has a temper, is jealous, over-reacts, doesn't handle the kids well, etc. You submit because you are called to. Period. Your husband is not perfect, but my dear, neither are you. You will fail your husband as much as he will fail you. When you fail him as a wife does he then have the right to stop providing for your needs? No! He provides for you irregardless of your actions because that is what he is commanded by God to do.

Now, what does submission look like? If you are looking for a do this, don't do this list I can't give you one. Submission isn't that simple. It's not a cookie cutter idea. It's a heart thing. Bottom line....you should wake up on a daily basis and strive to glorify and bless your husband with every action and every word spoken. When you get dressed in the morning do you choose your clothing based on what you feel would please him? Do you strive to fix meals that will nourish him? Do the words you say both while he's there and when he's not honor him and his name?

Submission is a heartfelt act of love. It's the simple act of putting your husband's needs and desires before you own. And in return husbands are commanded to love their wives as their own bodies. When both spouses live under the provisions God set for marriage it is a beautiful thing! The husband feels loved, honored, and most of all respected as the authority of his home that God intended him to be. And the wife feels loved, protected, cherished, and uplifted as the help meet for her husand that God intended her to be specifically for that man.

I have seen far too many marriages where both parties are vying for the position of authority and where neither husband nor wife are submitting to God and their intended places. It is my heartfelt prayer that every year there are more and more couples who seek God's guidance for their marriage and are willing to whole heartedly and without excuse submit to God's will for their marriages!